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A while back, where I do some part-time work, we had a little meeting and some people were discussing the whole men being allowed in female dressing rooms and possibly restrooms. When I stated my opinion on the matter (I'm opposed to it in case you're wondering and I will say why.) things got WAY out of hand. Turns out, I was the only person who saw the idea of being dangerous and I was completely attacked over it! My job was also threatened for me stating my opinion! Honestly though, I wasn't hateful about it at all.
Anyways, after reading about Macy's firing an employee because she refused to let a man go in the ladies dressing room (he said he was really a woman) - in the American Decency newsletter, I couldn't keep quiet anymore.
I understand this heated discussion was at our work place so I can see it being something the employers don't like. What I can't understand is why I was the only one threatened and completely shi* on. I mean, the things co-workers and those above me said to me after I stated my opinion was far worse than my opinion itself! That's beside the point...
For a while now, I've almost blogged about this, but I tried forever to let it "blow over." Now I'm not talking about the stupid work discussion. I'm talking about the issue in general and the company I work for might not like to hear my opinions if they differ from theirs, but this is my blog. I'm free to go ahead and say how I feel and the main reason I'm doing so is because I think if someone happens across this, it might open their eyes or maybe someone who feels the same as me will see this and feel encouraged, maybe even speak out themselves! Now is a great time to go ahead and say: if you are opposed to Macy's "policy" of allowing males into female dressing rooms you can send them a letter here:
I'll explain a little before I go on my rant. The above link is where you can go to send Macy's a letter asking them to change that policy. You don't have to type your own words as the wonderful American Decency.org has one "pre-written." You can simply put your name and email and hit send or you can fill in your own personalized letter like I did. To read more about the topic before sending a letter you can do so here:
American Deceny has truly been a life saver for me. They're where I often get my resources when I want to take action and I can't even begin to say how much I've learned and accomplished with those guys. They're simply amazing! While I might not agree with every single thing they do (that would be rare though!) they're a wonderful organization to sign up with, get newsletters, etc. Anyways, back to topic...
First I want to go ahead and say that I have absolutely no "beef" with gays or transgenders or any person in the world. If you know me at all, you've probably gathered that I'm a lover! I love people of all kind. I'm not against gay people. I have gay family members and I accept them just like the straight ones! I don't have issues with transgender people either. Just because we might not live the same kind of life or have the same preferences does not mean I am opposed to them. I love all kinds of people! Ok, that's out of the way...
My problem with this whole Macy's allowing men in the women's dressing room is simple enough if you take the time to listen.
Number 1: If Macy's decides to let men in the women's dressing room, more companies will follow in their stupid foot steps and my biggest problem is what's next? If men are allowed in our dressing rooms is it only a matter of time before they're allowed in our restrooms? BUT me saying I don't like this makes me sexist, against LGBT and horrible. When I say I don't like that policy because of the risks and privacy violation, I MUST be against them, right? Wrong! OK? In this case, Macy's is putting their LGBT customers above all else, as if they're better customers? This is not equal treatment. What about our privacy, our rights?
Number 2: My problem is not Macy's really. It's that this could turn into a policy that our everyday grocery store develops and it's stepping on the rights of women and children and men who aren't comfortable.
Number 3: If a man can claim to be a transgender, he's allowed in. That simple? Wait! So my little girl could be using the dressing room and any man could claim to be transgender and go do as he pleases?! Also, what about me? I'm not the kind of woman that will be naked in front of strangers. It's a violation of my privacy if all it takes is a man saying "Oh, didn't you know? I'm transgender." and bam!
Number 4: Are we really going to pretend rapists, molestors and other sick, sorry as hell predators AREN'T going to use this as an excuse? One of the people in the discussion at work said to me "are you stupid? Do you REALLY think rapists are going to go through the trouble of that?" Ha! Yes, yes I do. You know why? Because guys, I was raped. I know firsthand what a predator will do to get what he wants and if the sorry piece of crap would go so far as to put drugs in a woman's drink, don't you think he'd go so far as to pretend he's trans just to get his victim? Yes. It's true and it's real. I'm not saying this is bound to happen, but doesn't it raise the risks? Doesn't it concern you or worry you?
Or how about the guy who sees a female going in the dressing room and just wants to "sneak one little peek." Do we really think somebody in this world won't use that? I'm sorry, but I feel very strongly about this and being someone who's been through crappy things in my life, I tend to get fired up any time I feel women's privacy is being violated or pushed to the side like we don't matter. I don't know many women who'd be comfortable changing in a dressing room with men in there. Think about those gaping holes in the doors and in a lot of dressing rooms, only a shower curtain! WTF? No, Macy's, I will NOT be trying on any clothing at your store! As a matter of fact, I won't even step foot in a Macy's store. Maybe when men and women, children AND trans people are given equal rights, then I would consider it. As far as I'm concerned Macy's is unethical and I don't think I could even get over the stupididty enough to ever go to a Macy's again. Yes, that's strong, but I do have my reasons for such strong concern.
