(This is only the second part for now)
5 years ago, my closest friend and I made plans to spend the weekend at her house and invite our high school boyfriends over. She picked me up that night but we didn't go to her house. Instead, she took me to a party which was all men. All 8-10 years older than us. I knew none of them. When we pulled up I wouldn't go in because I didn't know anyone and that wasn't our plan. She promised she wouldn't leave me by myself so I agreed to go in.
Shortly after that, I was drugged with rohypnol (date rape drug) by a man who was 26. I was 15. He was huge. Weight: 245 lbs. Height: about 5'9 Ok, that's huge to me, I'm 97 lbs. and only 5'1.
I knew something was seriously wrong with me. I was violently sick and could feel myself kind of fading out. You know? Like I was going into a coma, honestly, that's what I thought. A while later, I was sure I was dying. It was like I was paralyzed, completely unable to move any part of my body, barely able to speak, unaware of where I was or how I got there. I'm only able to recall parts of that night (with a long and painful process I was able to recall parts of the night, with help & time) The last thing I was able to recall, after going inside, was being in his car. Locked in his car and him threatening me. I begged to get out but it wasn't happening. I said I was going to puke so, he got out, came to my door, picked me up and held me at his chest then, dropped me on the ground. I could actually feel my ribs crushing.
There, I laid, unable to move. The only thing I could do was puke and beg him to call and ambulance or at the least my mother. I remember saying "If you won't let me call my moma and say I love her then, leave me here to die." I knew I was dying. I had no option but to lay on the ground and pray. And I did!
I know a lot of time passed between that moment and me coming back to, to find myself in a bed but, I'm still unsure how long I was unconscious. The next thing I was able to remember was returning to consciousness enough to feel excruciating pain and know what was going on. He was on top of me, all 245 pounds digging into my ribs. I was too weak to tighten my stomach. As soon as I realized what he was doing with me I managed to scream, using my every strength I yelled for my "friend."
She came. She stood right in the door way. And watched. Watched him biting my chest, stomach, bottom lip, and other parts of me with his teeth. He had bitten me over 11 times. Each one bled and bruised. My shirt, skirt, and underwear were ruined, stained with blood. The inside of my shirt had thick pieces of MY skin & blood stuck to it.
I still remember every piece of clothing I had on. I even remember the underwear. I had my current boyfriend burn all of the things I was wearing. I still have scars on my chest and stomach from those bites. When I realized my "friend" wasn't coming to help, but to watch. I knew I had to muster up some strength to fight alone. I did but didn't get far. I was only able to squirm. That was the longest moment of my life and by far the worst.
When HE was done, he left the room. I tried moving myself but couldn't move. After trying and trying I stood from the bed. With the help of the walls, I stumbled out and made it to the front door. He was standing there, in nothing but his underwear. He threatened my life, my familie's lives, and gave me a detailed description of our where abouts and what he'd do if I told. He let me leave but only if my "friend" drove me straight home. I wasn't allowed to leave alone. She drove me home.
I couldn't even walk myself to my front door. Thankfully, a guy that I was really close with at the time was on the porch waiting for me & he helped me inside. My neck & chest was showing & had blood, bruises & some black shi* all over me. He freaked and asked 100 questions. I cried. Then I told him everything.
After that I knew something was really wrong with my ribs because of the excruciating pain so before burning my clothing and showering I had to have "that shi*" done. Come to find out, my ribs were severely bruised, a few other injuries and of course the open wounds from the bites. Then, I was free to go home & stay in bed until the injuries healed. I wasn't able to take a breath with out shrieking for 3 whole days. I slept every bit of those 3 days away except for waking up to shower, use the bathroom, and take meds. I couldn't even smoke a cigarrette for 3 days because of the pain. I was still really high from the rohypnol until the 4th day.
This past August, the 15th to be exact made it 5 years since it happened. I talked to my "friend" that day. Which was only 2 months ago. She contacted me on Facebook. I guess she felt guilty & needed to relieve her guilt. No apology though. I said little, that was it.
Anyways, he's free now. He's free to roam the streets and live only 10 min. away from me and free to hurt more women. When it was all over with & I went to the authorities, I found out that he had done the same thing to at least 2 other women.
For the past 5 years, I have lived in fear of him. I have seen him 6 times out in public. Every time, I've had a panic attack. The very 1st time I seen him out, I was with my current boyfriend & he confronted him. Actually he beat the hell out of him. Needless to say that rapist didn't fight back. After all, a rapist like that only wants to fight a woman that's much weaker than him. He would never fight a real man.
After seeing him on the road next to mine one day while I was in my car, I freaked and have only drove alone in my car 3 times since. I have never spoken to my "friend" who after speaking with authorities and going through the whole process, I found that she was not a friend at all. She was an accomplice. An accomplice to MY being raped. She set me up.
*There's more. Yes, more of this story. I will post the next part this week*
1 comment:
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