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So, you've decided you might want to start up a pen-palling relationship with a prisoner, but you aren't sure what or how to go about it? Thank God for me!
As I mentioned before, I have began a little bit of a relationship with my lovely pen pal. She's turned out to be a wonderful pen-pal friend and what started out as trying to do something to brighten a stranger's day has now turned into something that I actually benefit from. Call me a sap, but Lilly is actually a great writing friend. Turns out I had a letter from another inmate the other day. He's very kind and it made me so sad and so happy when I read the part of his letter that said that he hadn't received any mail or visitors since 2008! He said I made his day! See, there's a site called Write A Prisoner.com as well as a few others. I prefer Write A Prisoner because they're actually interested in making a difference in the lives of others and they're involved with everyone who joins.
So, you can visit this site and see profiles of inmates. Their loved ones takes the time to put up a profile so people can mail them. That's how I was introduced to mine. The guy who wrote me saying he hadn't recieved anything since 08' has had a profile up for a very long time and nobody has sent him a thing. I couldn't believe it. His crime wasn't even a huge one. He's not a mass murderer, but I just assumed more people had used this means of reaching out to people. I could not imagine being in a cell for decades and never recieveing a visitor or one blasted piece of paper saying "hi, hope all is well." Nothing! It broke my little heart. OK, yea, I'm a little on the sensitive side. My heart hurts when I see a dead animal on the side of the road. I guess some people were just made with extra sensitive hearts to make up for those who have cold hearts, right?
I have not wrote the guy back yet as I'm nervous about that. Lilly was different, she's female. I'm not looking to write someone who ends up having... feelings because I am in a monogamos relationship. It's hard because I want to write back and say "bless your little heart! I'll be your shoulder. Lean on me. I'll be the one to brighten your day by sending a piece of paper." I want to, but I do not want to be responsible for any kind of bad things! The guy is a good bit older than me, close to my own dad's age, but hey, when you've been locked up I suppose even a youngster looks good.
I'll write something back to the guy. Maybe it'll turn out that he truly only wants a friend as well. If it turns out that he doesn't, I will find him a pen-pal that is OK with that type of relationship.
Now, that's just a bit of my story. I thought it might be something useful. However, I do believe some people, prisoner should be able to communicate. Think about the other people in there who have nobody. I'm sure there's someone out there besides me who would enjoy a little letter writing. It's not like you have to work hard. Most of the time you'll get a letter from them one week and by the time you send them one back, it's a month before you hear back. No time consuming work here.
I'm not trying to convince anyone to write an inmate. I'm only hoping to bring this to ya'll's attention that they are out there (or IN there) and maybe it's something you've never thought of, but are interested in. If not, that's OK.
However, if you do think you want to write a prisoner, sites like Write A Prisoner are your best friend. A good tip though, is to not send out multiple pen-pal requests at once! You don't want to end up with 10 inmates responding with "yes" and then it turn into a burden. I highly recommend finding one that seems to fit you well--look through their profiles. Wait for a response. You may not get one. Some responses take up to a month. Some only a week. If you get a yes and still want another pen-pal, no problem. Feel free. Nothing wrong with that.
BE SERIOUS
Do not write to someone and promise to pen-pal them if you don't truly plan to write occasionally! That's hurtful and can be damaging to someone who's stuck in a prison cell. If you cannot commit to a letter every month or two, either be up front about it or reconsider taking it on. You don't have to write back as soon as you get their letter, but you shouldn't request a pen-pal if you're going to string them along for a few months and not keep up.
RESEARCH
Find out why the person is in prison. Are you uncomfortable writing a murderer? Then research them before writing! You need to know a bit about the person first. If you've read their crime and their personal profile and you both are looking for the same thing i.e. a friend, a relationship-- no problem. You don't want to request a pen-pal only to find out they've killed and then want to back out. That'd be awkward!
These are just a few things I thought may be helpful to someone considering pen-palling with a prisoner. This is one thing I like to do to brighten someone's day. There are other ways. If this particular hobby does not interest you, take up something else. Compliment a stranger, leave a kind word for someone you know. If pen-palling a prisoner is a way you brighten someone's day, I'd love to hear your stories! How did you meet? How long have you been pen-palling? Are you close friends with your pen-pal? Any tips YOU think I left out here? All shares are welcome. Of course, I'll be on this topic again at some point I'm sure.
As I mentioned before, I have began a little bit of a relationship with my lovely pen pal. She's turned out to be a wonderful pen-pal friend and what started out as trying to do something to brighten a stranger's day has now turned into something that I actually benefit from. Call me a sap, but Lilly is actually a great writing friend. Turns out I had a letter from another inmate the other day. He's very kind and it made me so sad and so happy when I read the part of his letter that said that he hadn't received any mail or visitors since 2008! He said I made his day! See, there's a site called Write A Prisoner.com as well as a few others. I prefer Write A Prisoner because they're actually interested in making a difference in the lives of others and they're involved with everyone who joins.
So, you can visit this site and see profiles of inmates. Their loved ones takes the time to put up a profile so people can mail them. That's how I was introduced to mine. The guy who wrote me saying he hadn't recieved anything since 08' has had a profile up for a very long time and nobody has sent him a thing. I couldn't believe it. His crime wasn't even a huge one. He's not a mass murderer, but I just assumed more people had used this means of reaching out to people. I could not imagine being in a cell for decades and never recieveing a visitor or one blasted piece of paper saying "hi, hope all is well." Nothing! It broke my little heart. OK, yea, I'm a little on the sensitive side. My heart hurts when I see a dead animal on the side of the road. I guess some people were just made with extra sensitive hearts to make up for those who have cold hearts, right?
I have not wrote the guy back yet as I'm nervous about that. Lilly was different, she's female. I'm not looking to write someone who ends up having... feelings because I am in a monogamos relationship. It's hard because I want to write back and say "bless your little heart! I'll be your shoulder. Lean on me. I'll be the one to brighten your day by sending a piece of paper." I want to, but I do not want to be responsible for any kind of bad things! The guy is a good bit older than me, close to my own dad's age, but hey, when you've been locked up I suppose even a youngster looks good.
I'll write something back to the guy. Maybe it'll turn out that he truly only wants a friend as well. If it turns out that he doesn't, I will find him a pen-pal that is OK with that type of relationship.
Now, that's just a bit of my story. I thought it might be something useful. However, I do believe some people, prisoner should be able to communicate. Think about the other people in there who have nobody. I'm sure there's someone out there besides me who would enjoy a little letter writing. It's not like you have to work hard. Most of the time you'll get a letter from them one week and by the time you send them one back, it's a month before you hear back. No time consuming work here.
I'm not trying to convince anyone to write an inmate. I'm only hoping to bring this to ya'll's attention that they are out there (or IN there) and maybe it's something you've never thought of, but are interested in. If not, that's OK.
However, if you do think you want to write a prisoner, sites like Write A Prisoner are your best friend. A good tip though, is to not send out multiple pen-pal requests at once! You don't want to end up with 10 inmates responding with "yes" and then it turn into a burden. I highly recommend finding one that seems to fit you well--look through their profiles. Wait for a response. You may not get one. Some responses take up to a month. Some only a week. If you get a yes and still want another pen-pal, no problem. Feel free. Nothing wrong with that.
BE SERIOUS
Do not write to someone and promise to pen-pal them if you don't truly plan to write occasionally! That's hurtful and can be damaging to someone who's stuck in a prison cell. If you cannot commit to a letter every month or two, either be up front about it or reconsider taking it on. You don't have to write back as soon as you get their letter, but you shouldn't request a pen-pal if you're going to string them along for a few months and not keep up.
RESEARCH
Find out why the person is in prison. Are you uncomfortable writing a murderer? Then research them before writing! You need to know a bit about the person first. If you've read their crime and their personal profile and you both are looking for the same thing i.e. a friend, a relationship-- no problem. You don't want to request a pen-pal only to find out they've killed and then want to back out. That'd be awkward!
These are just a few things I thought may be helpful to someone considering pen-palling with a prisoner. This is one thing I like to do to brighten someone's day. There are other ways. If this particular hobby does not interest you, take up something else. Compliment a stranger, leave a kind word for someone you know. If pen-palling a prisoner is a way you brighten someone's day, I'd love to hear your stories! How did you meet? How long have you been pen-palling? Are you close friends with your pen-pal? Any tips YOU think I left out here? All shares are welcome. Of course, I'll be on this topic again at some point I'm sure.
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